Thursday, December 10, 2009


As most of you know yesterday was my 31st wedding anniversary, some of you asked how we made it to 31 years. Marriage is NOT easy, it is a constant work in progress, however I do have some tips that I have learned over the years.

Surround yourself with people who are supportative of your marriage. Easy you say, but take a moment and think of people you may know who slyly or openly are negative about marriage or your spouse. Over periods of time this negativity can worm it's way into your subconscience influencing your prospective towards your relationship.

Do NOT spend social time with people who cheat on their spouse. You may believe with all your heart that cheaters cannot influence you but marriage is forever, life can become dull , difficult, depressing, in times of stress your defences CAN be breached, protect yourself .

DATE NIGHT, schedule it, plan it, make it happen. Spend time alone with your spouse, turn off your cell phones, do NOT invite your children, friends or family, this time should be about the two of you . Do not discuss money problems, problems with your children, family or jobs. This time should simulate pre-marriage behavior.

Reflect, look at old photos and remind yourself why you fell in love with your spouse, look for those qualities in your spouse today. Try to understand how life, disappointments, illness, family issues, jobs and other infuences effect your spouse.

Most importantly FORGIVENESS - forgive yourself and your spouse.

Be your spouse's best friend, his/her champion and lover.

I am no expert but wanted to share a few things I have learned over the years.


  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. Click on the Blogger icon in the upper left of your page to go to the dashboard and then you can pick a post to edit.

    Ok, that's some great advice. I have been married 5 1/2 years and I've loved most of it and I've learned from all of it. I love my wife and she is my best friend. We don't schedule date nights but we take them as often as we can. I am sure (at least I hope) that we'll make it to 30+ years. Congrats, Connie.

  3. Dan, you are a wise man, I am sure you and your wife will celebrate many years of a happy marriage.
    thank you so much for the info on how to edit my posting.

  4. Great advice Connie. Thank you and congrats!

  5. thank you Lana for reading my blog, hope to see you soon.

  6. Great advice! I know I can use it! We're celebrating 6 years next month and things are definitely in a "slump." Thanks for the pep talk, hun! =o)

  7. Katrina,
    Thank you for reading, and I hope my ramblings can help you. Every married couple goes thru slumps, highs, stress and other problems. You are not alone, it is a natural part of life, DM me anytime if you need a shoulder to cry on, I am actually a pretty good listener, I try not to judge or preach.